What would people see in me, if they could never hear or read any of my words again?

In that one area where we express our affiliation and our value of that person to another, I am trying to re-remind myself: it is not in what I say that matters. It really is in what I do.

My guess is at the end of each of our lives, people remember more of what we showed them, through our gestures, gifts, and behaviors, than what we simply told them, because it is in our showing- in our doing, in our serving- that we validated what we really thought about them. And if we actually spoke less in our lives but still acted demonstrably to serve others, the message would still gets across, but in a medium stronger than speech. “Actions speak louder than words.” I can love without words, but can I truly love without actions?

I can throw around nice, big, pleasant, flattering words all I want, but if I never go out of my way to assist, to support, to facilitate, to invest in, or to physically or financially aid- to offer action that lifts up, strengthens, buttresses, or heartens another in my life- my words are cheap.

Love always costs us a little something- which is why a life lived through few words can still be a life overflowing in love, while a life lived through many words but few actions can be ineffectual, anemic, and empty.

Love always costs at least a little more than the words we often try to shoehorn it within.

And from that perspective, I am reminded how easily I say words, and how poorly I actually act towards others quite often.

I am reminded that too often, I am missing the meat and the point of it all.

I get so focused on getting, instead of giving, fixated on what I want and need instead of on who in my life I can strengthen and support- because I care about them.

Love serves.

Note to self.

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Photo Credit: “Untitled” by Rhonda via Flickr. Creative Commons 2.0 license.