Tonight after work I ran a few errands to help get the house more ready to receive summer guests, and then when I came home, I decided to make a pot of goulash, and to listen to a podcast by Tom Nelson.  Tom Nelson is the pastor of Denton Bible Church in Denton, Texas, and I remember some 20 or 25 years ago when I was introduced to this teacher by my friend Chris. From those early days until today, when I listen to a message by Tom, I feel like I am in his church, and that I am one of his congregants, and that we have had conversations in the past, and that he really knows God, and that he really knows me.  Tom speaks to you as a friend- as a friend who really knows the Bible, with the depth of one who has really sat down in it and looked at its many stories from varied angles, and who knows its participants intimately.  As a friend to the stories in God’s word, Tom is ready and honored to introduce you to them, hoping that you all will become close.  Tom is a great teacher like this because  he loves God, he loves God’s word and believes in it unflinchingly, he loves people, and he has a passion for seeing people come to life in Christ and grow with him.

Listening to Tom’s sermon on I Samuel 1, Tom mentioned at one point that he was 60, and at that moment my mind did a double-take, and I realized that Tom and I both had some mileage behind us.  And I thought about my life, and the choices I have made, and the faith that I have claimed sustains me, and I paused for a brief period and was silenced by a few questions that rose in my mind: in these 20 years that I have off and on been able to listen to Tom- in these two decades of playing adult and lobbying about my spiritual qualities- have I really been growing in trust and in faith?  have I become any more adept at living in and out of this grace He has promised His children?  Have I become more or less hardened to my selfishness?  Have I become a better, truer, and more trustworthy hearer and doer of His word, or have I simply let His words roll over me month after moth, year after year, not letting the yeast of his favor touch and alter my life?

The point of Tom’s sermon on this occasion was that Hannah, the barren first wife of a doting husband, spent much of her life watching his other spouse, Penninah, crank out kid after kid, while she lived a modest life and tried to walk with the Lord- only to have her womb shut up by God for years as she prayed for a child.  Hannah’s heart ached to simply give her husband a child of their own, that she would then give back to God for the accomplishment of His will and His interests.  She just wanted a son.

The story is a reminder to us that God’s plans are not ours, and that while we may not make sense of things, we may also endure some deep heartaches and hurts as we try to walk faithfully with God, trying to do His will.

God all along intended to answer Hannah’s prayer, for her son Samuel would be the first prophet in a long and austere lineage of voices to the nation of Israel- a great and esteemed man in Israel’s history.

Tom’s point was that God knows what He’s doing, even when to us, it seems like He may not.  His timing is not our timing, as His plans are often not what we thought we were destined for.  However, He still wants us to seek Him and keep Him up front.  That way, when the story breaks for good, we’ll be able to see the full arc of it- and the good He had planned along the way.

I was reminded tonight that a godly man has an exuberant vital faith when he is 40, and still when he is 60.  The roots of his faith have deepened, and so have his trust and confidence in God.  When hardship hits, he goes to God first, and finds his stronghold with Him.  And he waits out the trials with God- not contending with God- because He knows God is with him, not assailing him in the storms.

Hannah means ‘grace’ in Hebrew, Nelson points out.  Some kindnesses of God take time and trust to see.  But God and His promises will arrive on time for us- as they did for Hannah.  And as Tom points out, and demonstrates in his own life and ministry, we just need to cling to God and trust His word, and be faithful to Him.  That is what God asks of us.

Hang on- it may not look right now, but be faithful and walk with Him, and see what He does with it. He delights in turning trials into triumphs.